Saturday, December 31, 2011

Good-Bye 2011...

Time to say good-bye to another year and say hello to a new year. Which also means remembering to write 2012 instead of 2011. I am sure I'll get the hang of doing that come June when half the year has already past. lol

I am not sure really how I feel overall about this past year. It was a roller coaster of a ride kind of year for me and my family. I can't say I loved this year as a whole, as some of it was utterly life changing and we are still reeling from those changes that have happened. Still trying to figure out how to move forward and to adjust to the changes in our lives. There have been high points and that is what I try to focus on. Most days I do well with focus on the positive. Most days. The high point of the year for me has definitely been spending so much of the summer with Ava just doing little things and trying to make it a nice and memorable summer overall. I don't know about her, but I definitely feel like this summer we grew so much closer with our relationship. We spent the summer going on picnics, shopping, watching movies, going swimming, drawing pictures, painting, watching fireworks, going swimming some more (we did a lot of this), having sleepovers, staying up late, going to lots of different parks to play, late night trips to eat ice cream at Dairy Queen, cheerleading practice and of course celebrating her birthday. And I know I am leaving out a ton of things we did over the summer. For me that has been the absolute best part of my year. Of course there are lots of other moments, but for me the summer with Ava has definitely been the most memorable.

We've had some downs though when it comes to my Mom and her decline with Alzheimer's. My Mom had a seizure and that was such a scary time. I thought for sure we just might lose her. After that we've had more setback with her and unfortunately the medicine to slow her illness down, just has not been successful for her. We went to her Alzheimer's specialist the day before Thanksgiving and were told essentially there was nothing else to be done to try and help her. She was put on a new medicine to try and help with the aggressive behavior she has been showing on a more frequent basis. We were told she is now in the severe stages of the illness and we should start looking into alternate care for her. We were hoping to be able to continue to care for her at home at least until after Christmas, but 12 days before Christmas we had to put her into the hospital because we were not able to properly care for her anymore. I think that was the hardest day of my life so far. I don't know that I am really able to even put my emotions about this change in our life into words just year. I know my emotions are just all over the place with this still. I am grateful though that this week she was able to be moved to a facility closer to home and is now 10 minutes from us, instead of 40 minutes away. So our prayers have been answered when it comes to her being closer to her family so we can see her on a more regular basis.

I don't know what 2012 will bring for us, but I can only continue to pray for strength and peace for my family in dealing with what is in store for us this coming year. So I say so long 2011, it has definitely been one for the memory books. Now if Illinois just wins their bowl game today, 2011 just might end on a really high note!

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