Saturday, September 29, 2012

Happy Birthday Mom...

Wishing my Mom the happiest 57th birthday.  In this life we take so much for granted.  We take those we love for granted I think the most.  It's crazy how much a life can change in just one year.  This day has been weighing on my mind for some time now.  Bittersweet for sure.  Earlier in the year, I wasn't so sure we would see this day with you still being here. 57.  It sounds so young, too young, to think I will be visiting you in a nursing home.  Not out to eat at Cracker Barrel or Monical's or surprising you with a party at my house, surrounded by our family and having a girls lunch with your sisters, daughters, and nieces.  I know my heart is not prepared for today.  I feel so broken inside and the tears cannot stop coming.  I miss you so very much.  Not hearing your voice and the loving words you spoke all the time to those you loved and cared for, is more difficult than one can imagine.  God how I miss you so.  Watching Ava make your card and seeing how deeply she misses you.  I know my life has been blessed to have you for the time that I have, the selfish part of me just wants more time, more memories.  More I love you's.  More birthday celebrations with you. But today I also celebrate another year with you.  I have to put the sadness that fills my heart today aside, and remember the joys and the blessings I have been given. 

 You were that little girl who was always smiling and laughing.  This is one of my favorite pictures of you as a little girl, because that is the person you carried with you into adult hood.  You loved to laugh and oh what a laugh it was.  Especially, when you got together with your sisters and brothers.  :) 
Even as an adult, you faced many things no one should have to face, but you never lost that smile or the ability to have a good time and to laugh.  You always found a reason to celebrate and enjoy the life you had and most importantly the things you were blessed with.

I think this will always be my favorite photo of you that was taken not long before you were diagnosed with Alzheimer's.  You were getting ready to go out on a date with Dan for the night and I just thought you looked so pretty and so happy.  I am forever grateful that I quickly snapped this photograph before you left.  It' how I like to remember you most in my adult years.  I am also grateful for last year and one last birthday celebration with you, surrounded by those who love you more than we could ever imagine loving someone.  It was a good day and I always knew that day was truly a gift.  You were in such a good mood and you loved having your family around you to celebrate your life and your special day.  Thank you for all the wonderful memories.  I don't know what God has in store for us in the next year, but I know I am so blessed to have had you for my Mom these last 35 years and even more blessed to have had you as my best friend, especially in my adult years.  Happy Birthday to the most incredible Mom I could have ever had and have been blessed in sharing my life with.  I love and miss you every single day.

6 comments:

  1. A hard day for you. We should always be thankful for each day the Lord allows us because as you said, you never know what tomorrow might bring.

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    1. Very true Linda. God has blessed me and my family with many wonderful days with my Mom. It was a difficult day, but it was also a blessing in having one more birthday to celebrate with my Mom.

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  2. Your mom is beautiful, and I have tears in my eyes reading your post this morning, and seeing your wonderful photos. God bless you all on this special day, and may your loving memories continue to fill your heart with joy!

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    1. Thank you Terri. The beauty of life is seeing some of the most wonderful traits of my Mom in my daughter. That is truly a gift. My family has been so blessed to have had so many years with such a strong and amazing woman.

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  3. Oh Mandi..I am catching up on blogs since returning from vacation and I just read your post about Dan and now I am reading this one about your mom and I have had tears running down my cheeks the entire time. Your mom is such a beautiful woman. Your tribute to her is awesome. You are so blessed with such beautiful memories.

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    1. Thank you Kris. I am very blessed to have such beautiful memories of my Mom. She is beautiful inside and out.

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